‘A great deal of what people say, think, or do is actually motivated by fear, which of course is always linked with having your focus on the future and being out of touch with the Now. As there are no problems in the Now, there is no fear either’. Eckhart Tolle
I love this quote by Tolle. I try to remember it whenever I fear something, and usually it works. Sometimes my fears and worries about the future take my mind on a rollercoaster of cyclical thoughts and I start thinking about what if this, that or the other. But then I realise that I shouldn’t worry because I don’t even know how my life will pan out. The only thing I can do is enjoy what I have now and work towards what I want, but not worry about it.
Today I read an article in Psychologies called Dare to be weak by researcher Brené Brown, who also has a popular video on Ted about vulnerability.
She talks about the human need for connection and how vulnerability and accepting that it is necessary is the key to connecting with people.
Her research shows that people who feel loved and have a sense of belonging, believe that they are worthy of love and belonging. To experience life, you have to allow yourself to be vulnerable and put your neck out in uncomfortable situations.
It means that you have to have the courage to step out of your comfort zone and do whatever you want to do and say without fearing how this will make you exposed and vulnerable to the opinions and possible rejection by others and those close to you. It’s about being authentic and showing the real you, which leaves you vulnerable and exposed but that is also the only way to create meaningful connections with people.
You have to avoid wanting to make everything certain and perfect and instead accept who you really are and not who you should be.
‘We need to let ourselves be seen, really seen, and love with our whole hearts, even though there is no guarantee, have joy and gratitude, think I am enough and be vulnerable because that is how you know you’re alive.’ Brené Brown